A Letter to the Family

     Ned Stark was a man of vision.  He recognized that the kingdom of Westeros has enjoyed many seasons of harvest and reaping, sunshine and growth.  Even to this last breath, he uttered the warning, "Winter is Coming." Maybe not his VERY last breath...but definitely one of the last 200 or so.

     According to the experts, it takes a victim of sexual abuse approximately 15-20 years to come to terms with the abuse, and sometimes even longer before they are about to speak about it publically. In the grand old commonwealth of Virginia, there is no statue of limitations on prosecuting those who commit such crimes. As long as the abuser is alive, VA will allow the case to proceed. In a state south of the Mason Dixon line, where gays can't marry and shacking up is considered a sin, they atleast have something right.

     Unlike the Red Wedding, vengence is not my motive...but just like the Red Wedding, it surprises you how tight-lipped a family can truly be. We have enjoyed 20 years of denial...20 years of freedome...20 guilt free years...and now winter is upon us.
  
     Loyalties are not neccessary. The bloodline runs thick, and no one has been asked to choose sides. The anger that was built in the beginning has been replaced by peace, and relief, and acceptance. We can all take a deep breath. Winter is upon us...and those who were not prepared, are being left out in the cold.

     It is not for me to determine which is worse...to know and not act because you are unfamiliar with the consequences...or to be fully aware of the affects, and yet remain silent. Please know that I fight this fight for you as well. For your childhood that was lost...for your adulthood that was cut short...I fight for you as well.

     Winter is upon us. You were warned, but did not heed. My sympathies are rationed. Love and family are strong words, that are being reserved for the deserving. The familia titles that are given through birth or marriage have no weight here. Understand me...I am fighting for you too. For the shame you must have felt as a child. For the pain you must feel as an adult. I will gladly fight for you too. But please understand, you were warned...and winter is upon us.

Tiny Bird

       First, the facts. The hummingbird has long been seen as a metaphor that
represents the courage required to embark on an epic journey. Such tiny creatures, with wingspans of meer inches, migrate every year from Brazil to Canada. Their miniscule bodies are not build for the trek. They are unable to harness food and energy like their majestic cousins...and yet. The primal urge to make the journey is just as strong in them as it is in their larger relatives. What makes this creature truly amazing, is not its beauty or size, not its wealth or station in life...but simply its innate desire for the journey itself...its now time to start flying...

      It took me nearly 20 years to get this far, thats 5 life times for the average hummingbird. It took 1 therapist, 1 sister-in-law, 2 law enforcement officers, and 2 nieces for me to finally open my mouth and speak up...to say something. In the end I am no longer making this journey for me. This is for my 2 beautiful nieces, the 50+ little girls I have taught over the years, and the thousands of men and women who are not yet at a place in their lives where they can make this pilgrimage themselves. This is for you.